Being a parent isn't easy. I surprise myself when my parenting actually works. Today's lesson was sharing.
After church, my son got 2 mini cinnamon rolls. By the time my daughter got to the table, they were all gone. She asked if she could have one, he said no, and she got mad at him. We talked about the golden rule. How demanding from someone isn't right nor is not sharing. I encouraged him to make the right choice. Despite my talk, he said he didn't like it when people shared with him and ate both rolls. I didn't force him to share, just that I was disappointed. When she got upset with him, I reminded her that just because someone is mean to us, we can't be mean back.
When we got home, he asked if he could play with her pogo stick. I reminded him he said he didn't like it when people shared their things. He acknowledged he was wrong and apologized to his sister and even cited the golden rule.
A lot of teacher and parent guides mention giving choices to allow the child a way out of a bad situation. They usually don't mention what to do when they still choose the wrong way.
In this case, he later remembered what he had been taught and came back. But what if he makes a wrong choice and never returns to his upbringing?
The Bible does teach to teach your children the way to go so they will know when they are older.
It is a tough balance, allowing freedom while trying to teach character. Choosing the right way isn't the end goal, but them choosing God in their heart. Obedience to me isn't obedience to God. It keeps them safe today, but they will soon be on their own. Our character development must be centered on God so that they can have the freedom that He truly gives.
Sharing would have been nice so that I didn't have to hear them fight. But perhaps he learned a better lesson by receiving grace.
After church, my son got 2 mini cinnamon rolls. By the time my daughter got to the table, they were all gone. She asked if she could have one, he said no, and she got mad at him. We talked about the golden rule. How demanding from someone isn't right nor is not sharing. I encouraged him to make the right choice. Despite my talk, he said he didn't like it when people shared with him and ate both rolls. I didn't force him to share, just that I was disappointed. When she got upset with him, I reminded her that just because someone is mean to us, we can't be mean back.
When we got home, he asked if he could play with her pogo stick. I reminded him he said he didn't like it when people shared their things. He acknowledged he was wrong and apologized to his sister and even cited the golden rule.
A lot of teacher and parent guides mention giving choices to allow the child a way out of a bad situation. They usually don't mention what to do when they still choose the wrong way.
In this case, he later remembered what he had been taught and came back. But what if he makes a wrong choice and never returns to his upbringing?
The Bible does teach to teach your children the way to go so they will know when they are older.
It is a tough balance, allowing freedom while trying to teach character. Choosing the right way isn't the end goal, but them choosing God in their heart. Obedience to me isn't obedience to God. It keeps them safe today, but they will soon be on their own. Our character development must be centered on God so that they can have the freedom that He truly gives.
Sharing would have been nice so that I didn't have to hear them fight. But perhaps he learned a better lesson by receiving grace.
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