What is a friend?

What does it mean to be a friend? The dictionary defines it as

1.	a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

2.	a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter: friends of the Boston Symphony.

3.	a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile: Who goes there? Friend or foe?

4.	a member of the same nation, party, etc.

5.	(initial capital letter) a member of the Religious Society of Friends; a Quaker.

The term we will be looking at is the first definition.
My friends are people I enjoy being around. Some are male, some are female. Some friends I see regularly, some I see rarely. Some I get to see in person, some I only talk to on the phone or over the internet. For my friends, I like to think that I would do anything for them. I like to think that if they needed me day or night, I would be there for them. While this is rarely put to the test, I like to think that I pass when it is. I do not think that I would be the judge of that though.

But what does it mean to be a friend? How should we handle our relationships? Should friends just be people we hang out with and have fun with? Should we invest in our relationships or view them as disposable? How "deep" does a friendship relationship go?

The bible has several verses that deal with friendships.

Proverbs 27:10 has an interesting note about friends. "Your own friend and your father's friend forsake not; but if ruin befalls you, enter not a kinsman's house. Better is a neighbor near at hand than a brother far away." A neighbor who is near is better than family who is far away in time of need. Now the term for neighbor here does mean neighbor, not friend, but the application is important. It is important that we be available for those who are near us. This of course raises the question of "who is my neighbor?" Jesus answered the question with the Parable of the Good Samaritan. To be neighborly is to show mercy. How much better for the certain man who was robbed and beaten was the Samaritan who was near than family who was far away!

So if we our to love our neighbor and to show mercy to them, how much more should we give to our friends?

Proverbs 17:17 "A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity."

In this verse, the Hebrew uses the term Rea` for friend, which means friend or companion. This term is also used to describe how Moses and God would talk. Exodus 33:11 "Thus the Lord used to speak to Moses face to face, just as a man speaks to his" For love, it uses the term 'ahab. This is the same word used to describe the love between Abraham and his son Isaac, the love between Jacob and Rachel, the love between God and His people, the love we are to have for our neighbor.

Now I do not consider myself a Bible scholar. I read regularly but all is for not without the understanding provided by the Holy Spirit. God certainly wants us reading and exploring the Bible. So I use Greek and Hebrew dictionaries when appropriate, read commentaries, and other sources to help explain scripture. I did the same for friends.

I turned to the Baker's Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology and its write up on friends.As we saw with the English dictionary, friends can mean a lot of different relationships. We will focus on the relationships between friends. The article points to the relationship between Jonathan and David as an example of a relationship having all three qualities of friendship: association, loyalty, and affection. This story is broken into a couple of parts in the book of 1st Samuel. 1st Samuel 18:1-4 & 1st Samuel 20: 14-17. A friend gives in time of need. Luke 11:5-8. A friend consoles. 2nd Samuel 19:31-39. A friend rebukes in love. Proverbs 27:6. A friend provides strength. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. A friend will give their life. John 15:13 "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends."

What will you do for your friends?